Emergencies, politics, freedom, and Osama | Selangor Times
Wednesday
26·04·2017
Issue 118

 

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Emergencies, politics, freedom, and Osama
Writer: Lord Bobo
Published: Fri, 06 May 2011


Dear Lord Bobo, what is the effect of the five emergency declarations that have not been abrogated? @izmil_amri, via Twitter

THE effect of not abolishing the Emergency Declarations is simply that we are, from a legal point of view, still in a State of Emergency. So we should really go about our work and lives more anxiously in fear of our lives than we do.

We should have more checkpoints than those occasional ones that the traffic police set up for speedsters or the drinking fraternity. Domestic fashion should also revert to the sensibilities of the 1950s to 1960s with thick, dark-rimmed glasses, dull grey suits and grainy black-and-white photography.

This also explains why we should listen to our grandparents when they say, “Don’t take the trunk roads just to avoid the long-weekend jams”, or “Don’t go to Fraser’s Hill, it’s dangerous” because hey, they’re probably right when they say that Communists could jump out of them bushes/oil palm estates/jungles at any time.


Lord Bobo, I’m almost completely disinterested in politics, but have noticed a lot of noise being made about it in the past few weeks. Anyway, after all the dust has settled, what is the most important conclusion from the results of the Sarawak state elections? @A Political, via email

WE think we are right in saying that this is the first time the Sarawak state elections have been lavished so much attention by Orang Semenanjung (Peninsular Folk). Some say this was because of Pakatan Rakyat hyping up its significance. Some say this was because of the online media portals and social media like Twitter and Facebook.

Whatever it was, it’s undeniable that for the first time in history, the Peninsular Folk seemed to realise that these East Malaysians had separate state elections which were pretty significant in terms of the balance of political power at the national level.

His Supreme Eminenceness won’t go into the political intricacies of the results. Those have been analysed (or was it spun?) to death in the past couple of weeks anyway.
The bottom line is that BN won, retained their two-thirds majority, but saw their share of the popular vote drop from 63% to 55%.

Which one of these facts is more significant will depend on whether you are a BN or Pakatan supporter.

Political analysts were saying in the lead-up to the elections that the results would tell us whether or not a general election would be called this year. After the results were announced, the consensus is that – er, there is no consensus. So, nothing to be learnt there then.

Anyway, we can’t expect political analysts to come to certain conclusions. If they did, they’d have nothing else to write about for the rest of the year.

The most important conclusion then? BN won.

How is Selangor’s Freedom of Information Act (FOI Act) useful to the ordinary ape on the street? @adriene, via Twitter

THE importance of freedom of information as a fundamental right is beyond question. It is a right enshrined under Article 19 of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights.

Freedom of information is an important component of a transparent and accountable government. It plays a key role in enabling the great apes to know how government/public agencies are being run, and helps expose abuses of power, corruption, and mismanagement.

In general, the FOI Act provides access and rights to request for publicly available information from any government/public agencies; in this case, information in the state government/public agencies of Selangor.

An ordinary ape can now request for information vital to his or her well-being as a Selangor citizen, such as how many acres of land have been earmarked to be developed as banana plantations, the costs involved, and how much banana yield it is expected to produce.

This access to information vital as these government/public agencies are there to make decisions and utilise our tax ringgit on our behalf to provide the services that we need. The fact that we can have access to this information, which will then enable us to hold our government/public agencies to account is a very important part of democracy.

Democracy is bound to fail if government/public agencies operate in secrecy, regardless of how much discussion and open debate is allowed. Without quality information from public authorities, the nature and quality of public discussion would be significantly impoverished.

The FOI Act should result in an increased level of transparency, and make public servants more accountable for their actions, which should in turn encourage responsibility and lead to a reduction in instances of abuses of power and corruption.

The ideal end result of the FOI Act is an increase in public confidence in government/public agencies, as these agencies can show that they have nothing to hide from the ordinary ape on the street.


Dear Lord Bobo, so, they finally got that Osama guy, eh? @About Time, via email

IT’S amazing that killing this one guy has caused so much celebration in the US. The scenes in Times Square were really quite astonishing. We would think that the fact it took the world’s most sophisticated military, with the world’s most intricate intelligence network and equipment, almost nine years to find one man would be more embarrassing than impressive.

Then again, we must remember that “getting Osama” has been an obsession in the US, so much so that we read about 10-year-olds talking about how they “finally got the guy they’ve been after my whole life”.

But still, nine years? Perhaps their “intelligence” isn’t that smart – after all, if they wanted to know where he was, all they had to do was Ask Lord Bobo.
 

 

 Selangor Times

 

 

Also by Lord Bobo:

MCMC Unfrees Malaysia Today, and Elections Yay!

Have a question for Lord Bobo? Call on His Supreme Eminenceness by emailing asklordbobo@loyarburok.com, stating your full name, and a pseudonym (if you want), or tweeting your questions by mentioning @LoyarBurok and using the hashtag #asklordbobo. What the hell are you waiting for? Hear This, and Tremblingly Obey. Liberavi Animam Meam! I Have Freed My Spirit! 

10 reasons to vote

Have a question for Lord Bobo? Call on His Supreme Eminenceness by emailing asklordbobo@loyarburok.com, stating your full name, and a pseudonym (if you want), or tweeting your questions by mentioning @LoyarBurok and using the hashtag #asklordbobo. What the hell are you waiting for? Hear This, and Tremblingly Obey. Liberavi Animam Meam! I Have Freed My Spirit! 

No apologies, craving burgers and steaks

IS Shahrizat right to say she has nothing to apologise for? (Hardest Word, via email)

Excitement of the Malaysian Bar AGM and patriotism

Have a question for Lord Bobo? Call on His Supreme Eminenceness by emailing asklordbobo@loyarburok.com, stating your full name, and a pseudonym (if you want), or tweeting your questions by mentioning @LoyarBurok and using the hashtag #asklordbobo. What the hell are you waiting for? Hear This, and Tremblingly Obey. Liberavi Animam Meam! I Have Freed My Spirit! 

Sultan’s absolute power, and PR’s manifesto

Have a question for Lord Bobo? Call on His Supreme Eminenceness by emailing asklordbobo@loyarburok.com, stating your full name, and a pseudonym (if you want), or tweeting your questions by mentioning @LoyarBurok and using the hashtag #asklordbobo. What the hell are you waiting for? Hear This, and Tremblingly Obey (although trembling is optional if you are somewhere very warm)! Liberavi Animam Meam! I Have Freed My Spirit! 

True Malaysians and the lowdown on Lahad Datu

Ask Lord Bobo is a weekly column by LoyarBurok (www.loyarburok.com) where all your profound, abstruse, erudite, hermetic, recondite, sagacious, and other thaesaurus-described queries are answered!

This is what democracy means

Have a question for Lord Bobo? Call on His Supreme Eminenceness by emailing asklordbobo@loyarburok.com, stating your full name, and a pseudonym (if you want), or tweeting your questions by mentioning @LoyarBurok and using the hashtag #asklordbobo. What the hell are you waiting for? Hear This, and Tremblingly Obey (although trembling is optional if you are somewhere very warm)! Liberavi Animam Meam! I Have Freed My Spirit! 

Smartphones and dumb politicians

Have a question for Lord Bobo? Call on His Supreme Eminenceness by emailing asklordbobo@loyarburok.com, stating your full name, and a pseudonym (if you want), or tweeting your questions by mentioning @LoyarBurok and using the hashtag #asklordbobo. What the hell are you waiting for? Hear This, and Tremblingly Obey (although trembling is optional if you are somewhere very warm)! Liberavi Animam Meam! I Have Freed My Spirit! 

#KL112 – Well done, PDRM

Have a question for Lord Bobo? Call on His Supreme Eminenceness by emailing asklordbobo@loyarburok.com, stating your full name, and a pseudonym (if you want), or tweeting your questions by mentioning @LoyarBurok and using the hashtag #asklordbobo. What the hell are you waiting for? Hear This, and Tremblingly Obey (although trembling is optional if you are somewhere very warm)! Liberavi Animam Meam! I Have Freed My Spirit! 

Rally or riot, and Ubah Rocket Style!

Have a question for Lord Bobo? Call on His Supreme Eminenceness by emailing asklordbobo@loyarburok.com, stating your full name, and a pseudonym (if you want), or tweeting your questions by mentioning @LoyarBurok and using the hashtag #asklordbobo. What the hell are you waiting for? Hear This, and Tremblingly Obey (although trembling is optional if you are somewhere very warm)! Liberavi Animam Meam! I Have Freed My Spirit! 

Show me your assets!

Have a question for Lord Bobo? Call on His Supreme Eminenceness by emailing asklordbobo@loyarburok.com, stating your full name, and a pseudonym (if you want), or tweeting your questions by mentioning @LoyarBurok and using the hashtag #asklordbobo. What the hell are you waiting for? Hear This, and Tremblingly Obey (although trembling is optional if you are somewhere very warm)! Liberavi Animam Meam! I Have Freed My Spirit! 

Hudud, Rosmah and Bumi conditions

 

Dear Lord Bobo – on a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “definitely not” and 10 being “definitely yes” – how likely do you think it is that hudud will be implemented nationwide if Pakatan Rakyat and PAS come to power? (Unisex Hair Salon, via email)

 

Lynas, Bung-isms, and media bias

Have a question for Lord Bobo? Call on His Supreme Eminenceness by emailing asklordbobo@loyarburok.com, stating your full name, and a pseudonym (if you want), or tweeting your questions by mentioning @LoyarBurok and using the hashtag #asklordbobo. What the hell are you waiting for? Hear This, and Tremblingly Obey (although trembling is optional if you are somewhere very warm)! Liberavi Animam Meam! I Have Freed My Spirit! 

Asean Declaration (or Limitation?) of Human Rights

LORD Bobo, does the signing of the Asean Declaration of Human Rights recently mean that the fight for human rights in Malaysia is over, and Lord Bobo has won? What does LoyarBurok plan to do now? Tech reviews? (Right to Fight, via email)

Of frogs, rats and anti-hopping law

 

Lord Bobo, what do you think of Penang’s new anti-hopping law? Is it constitutional? (Ribbit, via email)

 

UN Award for Bar and More Merchandise?

Lord Bobo. What is the United Nations Malaysia Award and why the heck did the meddlesome Bar Council get it? (Perkasasourkana, by email)

 

Of companies and going bankrupt

Have a question for Lord Bobo? Call on His Supreme Eminenceness by emailing asklordbobo@loyarburok.com, stating your full name, and a pseudonym (if you want), or tweeting your questions by mentioning @LoyarBurok and using the hashtag #asklordbobo. What the hell are you waiting for? Hear This, and Tremblingly Obey (although trembling is optional if you are somewhere very warm)! Liberavi Animam Meam! I Have Freed My Spirit! 

Malaysiakini 1 Irrational Home Minister 0

Dear Lord Bobo, I read that Malaysiakini won a court case and they can now publish a newspaper. Why is this important? How come Selangor Times has no problem? And what’s the big deal – who reads print anymore, anyway? News Junkie, via email

Dead grateful to your government?

Have a question for Lord Bobo? Call on His Supreme Eminenceness by emailing asklordbobo@loyarburok.com, stating your full name, and a pseudonym (if you want), or tweeting your questions by mentioning @LoyarBurok and using the hashtag #asklordbobo. What the hell are you waiting for? Hear This, and Tremblingly Obey (although trembling is optional if you are somewhere very warm)! Liberavi Animam Meam! I Have Freed My Spirit!

Shamelessly amateurish government propaganda

Dear Lord Bobo, what is the fuss about NGOs in Malaysia receiving funds from foundations like the National Endowment for Democracy (NED) and Open Society Institute (OSI)? I love my country. Is it true that these NGOs are planning to overthrow our government? (Jaguh Kampung, via email)

Strip searching the Home Minister and Police

Have a question for Lord Bobo? Call on His Supreme Eminenceness by emailing asklordbobo@loyarburok.com, stating your full name, and a pseudonym (if you want), or tweeting your questions by mentioning @LoyarBurok and using the hashtag #asklordbobo. What the hell are you waiting for? Hear This, and Tremblingly Obey (although trembling is optional if you are somewhere very warm)! Liberavi Animam Meam! I Have Freed My Spirit!

Crimes of photo-stomping and plagiarism

Dear Lord Bobo, I read that the 19-year old girl who surrendered herself to Johor police after she stepped on a photo of the prime minister was handcuffed. This seems harsh. However, KL police chief DCP Datuk Mohmad Salleh says police were just following the Criminal Procedure Code. Is this correct? Shackled, via email

Smart people entering politics, and Lord Bobo on Earth

Ask Lord Bobo is a weekly column by LoyarBurok (www.loyarburok.com) where all your profound, abstruse, erudite, hermetic, recondite, sagacious, and other thaesaurus-described queries are answered!

#Stop114A #Yes114A and banning books

Strange Olympics, Selective Prosecution

Dear Lord Bobo, what do you think of this human event called the Olympics? Go for Gold, via email

Who’s in charge after Parliament is dissolved?

Dear Lord Bobo, last week you said Parliament would automatically dissolve five years from the date of its first meeting, an election would have to be held 60 days after that, and Parliament must reconvene within 120 days of dissolution. But who would be the government of the country during that time? And who is supposed to conduct the election? What if the EC  does not do its job? Indelible Human, via email

Seeking public opinion doesn’t mean better laws

Dear Lord Bobo, I read that government departments and agencies must now seek public opinion before proposing draft amendments to existing laws or introducing new Bills. Does this mean that we will now get better laws? I Didn’t Shoot the Deputy, via email

Commissioning oaths and complaining about lawyers

Lord Bobo, what is a “commissioner for oaths”? It sounds very grand but I understand that all they do is sign photocopies of documents to make them certified true copies. What else do these commissioners do? I’m considering my career options, and looking for a career involving monotonous tasks that I can attend to in between writing poetry, and bring in a steady income stream. Walt Whitman, via email

German footballers, obsolete lawyers, and crime perception

Dear Lord Bobo, what is it about Germans that they always seem to do well in international football tournaments? It’s genetics, isn’t it? What chance does Malaysia have? PK, via email

Football Fever MCs, and Election Date Prediction!

Dear Lord Bobo, I head the Human Resources Department at the Malaysian office of a multinational company. I’ve been instructed by the Regional Head to clamp down on people who slack on their work due to watching too much football now that the European Championships are on. Whilst I understand that our offices in Europe and Hong Kong have issued warning notices and the like, is this possible in Malaysia? Any practical advice would be greatly appreciated. Bad Cop, via email

Campaigning for Robots

Dear Lord Bobo, by law, what is the campaigning period in the lead-up to the General Elections? SK Chan, via email

Sacked for attending Bersih rally?

I went to Bersih 3.0. But my boss saw my photo on Facebook and was very upset, as many of our clients are affiliated to the current Government. He called a department meeting and warned all of us that we cannot take part in such rallies in future, and says he is considering sacking me if we lose any clients over the next couple of months. I cannot afford to lose my job, as I have a family to support. Can he lawfully sack me? A Worker, via email

Fallacies Spun by Critics of the Bar

The Bar Council and the Malaysian Bar (the Bar) have been criticised recently as being pro-Opposition. This is because of the Bar’s press statements and its extraordinary general meeting resolution regarding the police brutality shown at the Bersih 3.0 sit-down rally.

Roger Tan replies to Loyarburok

I knew this was coming because as I said, it would be painful for some lawyers to read what I wrote in Unswayed by fear or favour’ last Sunday in The Sunday Star. I am indeed not wrong with my prognostication.

Of lawyers, protests and burgers

So Lord Bobo. Those darn Malaysian lawyers are at it again, I hear. A small minority of them went against the Will of the Majority, and their Bar Council passed a resolution condemning our hardworking boys in blue. Surely, the Bar Council must now register as a political party? Bemused Accountant, by email

More Than Nayati, and Unpatriotic Irene Fernandez?

Lord Bobo, it’s such a relief that Nayati Moodliar was found, but is it only children of a certain background, or who can trigger a media campaign that will be found? (Praying For The Lost, via email)

Bersih headache, and minimum wage

Dear Lord Bobo, I’ve got a massive headache post-Bersih. Not because I was kicked in the head by a mob (police or otherwise), but because of all the arguments flying around blaming different parties for the bad ending. My question is: Bersih is over, and the arguments can go on until the cows come home, but what do we do next? What happens now? Actifast, via email

No Erections Please, We’re DBKL

Dear Lord Bobo, is “Occupy Dataran” (or Bersih 3.0) breaking any laws by converging to sit at Dataran Merdeka? If so, which ones? (Rulebook, via email)

Seriously, corruption and evidence?

Dear Lord Bobo, a former Sime Darby GM was sentenced to 27 years’ jail for corruption. Is this a sure sign that the justice system is finally taking corruption seriously? Credit Where Due, via email

Dissolving the Selangor DUN, and Bersih again?

Dear Lord Bobo, looks like there will be a Bersih 3.0 on April 28. Aren’t all these public assemblies kinda boring already? Meh, via email

EO Trio : The Journey Home

Lord Bobo has yet to return from his inter-galactic travels. LoyarBurok instead wraps up the story previously found in the 29th edition of Selangor Times entitled “The Long Struggle for Trial” where Gan Pei Ling wrote about Arif, Rafe and Ramadhan – three boys who were “banished” for allegedly being involved in a stolen motorcycle gang. They were recently released from their restriction orders.

Damned If You Badu

Lord Bobo, what do you make of the Erykah Badu concert cancellation? Surely we cannot allow foreigners cavorting with “Allah” tattoos to perform here, right? If it had been allowed, we may well have seen riots and pure chaos.

Inter-religious competition and anti-trust?

Lord Bobo, do you think that Malaysians need guidelines for inter-faith relations? In Faith, via email

Exciting Malaysia, and Biased LoyarBurok?

There’s never a dull moment in Malaysia, is there? Every single day we get drama, comedy, deception, intrigue, sex, accusations, and scandal – and that’s only in the first five pages of the newspaper! Sandiwara, via email

Najib vs Malaysia, 1Care and Defamation

I read that the Prime Minister has threatened to unleash the forces of darkness on anyone who dares make trouble. Should I be afraid? Che Banana, via email

The peculiar case of Anwar's acquittal

Was Anwar acquitted because of a “special phone call to the judge”? Telekom, via email

Lawyers, Taxis and Anwar

I have a question that’s been puzzling me for a long time. Do lawyers really believe in their client’s innocence? If they don’t, will they refuse to take on a case, or is it their duty to defend anyone, whether or not they think they are innocent or guilty? Jimmy Liew, via email

Fighting for the rights of overseas voters

Dear Lord Bobo, what is #MOV that @PusatRakyatLB has been tweeting about? Something about an overseas voters’ case? Is it important? (Exiled Malaysian, via email)

Lord Bobo’s predictions for 2012

Dear Lord Bobo, as 2012 is almost upon us, can you look into your magic crystal ball and share some predictions for the coming year? Nostrildamus, via email

Floods – of tears and rainwater

Looking at the images and videos of North Koreans sobbing uncontrollably and emotionally banging the floor in disbelief at the death of Kim Jong Il, I can’t help but wonder how they can be so sad that such a bizarre and evil man died. Can you explain this? Voice of Reason, via email

Backing the accused

Dear Lord Bobo, when did “carnal intercourse against the order of nature” enter Malaysia’s Penal Code? Is it an archaic law? @adriene, via Twitter

Walk For Freedom – A waste of time?

Dear Lord Bobo – So the lawyers walked, but the Peaceful Assembly Bill was passed a few hours later anyway. Is it guaranteed to become law now? If so, wasn’t the walk just a waste of time?

Shopping, hoping and missing

I read that the goods in Kedai Rakyat 1Malaysia aren’t really cheaper than some hypermarkets. Which led me to wonder, where does Lord Bobo do his shopping? Hassan Jaffar, via email

Missing Bobo, and the UKM4

Lord Bobo. I’ve been reading a lot about this UUCA UKM4 thing. What’s the big deal? Is my life as a university student going to get better? Will I pass my exams more easily?

Contempt for politicians?

Dear Lord Bobo, I live in PJ, and my neighbours are always going on and on about how the area is so much “better” to live in since BN is no longer in charge. To be honest, I don’t see much of a difference. Is it just psychological? Unconvinced, via email

Judicially reviewing New Kamasutra

Dear Lord Bobo, what’s a judicial review? Is it reviewing the judiciary? Also, can a judicial review be reviewed? What’s that called? Rearviewmirror, via email

Budget thingamajiggy analysis and Nasi Lemak 2.0

Lord Bobo, in the wake of the Budget 2012 announcement, many of my friends were complaining on Facebook, Twitter, and at the mamak during breakfast that the Budget ignored the middle-class rakyat. For all the pre-Budget speculation, we didn’t receive any help to counter the problem of escalating cost-of-living expenses, or the fact that it’s almost impossible to buy a home without selling your soul to a bank for the next 30 years. Why were we forsaken? Ignored, via email

ISA deceptions and budget goodies

Can you please explain the mechanism for repealing the ISA in Parliament as well as the replacement of it by the two new laws? What kind of majority is required to carry the motion, and what are its implications in view of the current composition of Parliament? Keep up the good work! I never miss your column in Selangor Times each week! Loyarbochor, via email

Santa Najib's ISA gift, and sucky Bosses

Lord Bobo, what is your view of the Prime Minister's "gift to the nation" in his big announcement on the eve of Malaysia Day? Fear No More, via email

Bodyguards, 
tortes (and torts), and tips

My ambition is to be the personal bodyguard of a politician. Can you tell me if this move will take me to higher places? Ahmad “Tank” Saifuddin, via email

Cheras Scousers, religion and nose-picking

Lord Bobo, the English Premier League has started! Are you as excited as most of us are? What do you think of Liverpool’s chances of reliving our glory days? Born & Bred Scouser, via email

Volcanoes, lawsuits, airlines and the apocalypse

Lord Bobo, I’ve been seeing some interesting graffiti around KL. What’s a “volcano massage”? Avid Reader, via email

Laziness, naughty students and patriots

Dear Lord Bobo, why is my Member of Parliament so slow in fixing that clogged drain in front of my house and the broken row of lamp posts by the community hall? Is he sleeping on the job or what?! @Unhappy Monkey, via email

Thorns and thorny issues

Dear Lord Bobo, my nose is falling apart. It’s been suffering so much lately. First there was the teargas. After that, acrid haze. When that cleared, all I smell is durians everywhere! Are you a fan of durians? @I Smell, Therefore I Am, via email

Twitter, silat and a certain July 9 rally

Dear Lord Bobo, with all the news and noise coming out following July 9, how do I know who to believe? @Kon Fee Yusd, via email

How protests made me 
a Malaysian

As Lord Bobo’s minions busy themselves bailing people out, we interrupt our usual Ask Lord Bobo column to attempt to answer a crucial question: Is living in fear the Malaysian way of life?

The qualities of a lawyer, and why vote?

Is my biggest dream become lawyer. How should I do become good lawyer practise? But no need is famous. Tanks you. @Fengtau_2901, by email

100 apologies, power, and the hardest question

Looking at what happened with @fahmi_fadzil and Blu Inc, do all Tweeters now need to be extra careful about what they say on Twitter? Can someone really get into a lot of trouble for tweeting allegedly defamatory comments about another party? What does the law provide? @Angie Ng, via email

Presumptions and Malaysia, a Jedi nation?

Dear Lord Bobo, what is a presumption of innocence? Is it truly applicable in Malaysia? @christan_yh, via Twitter

Scandals, property, contracts and iPad 2

Why is it that the “most-read” articles on Malaysian online news sites are always either about gossip, sex scandals, or other frivolous issues? @Regina S, via email

1Malaysia email and squandered money

Dear Lord Bobo, what do you think of the proposed “1Malaysia email”? @SSharmila1076, via Twitter

Party whipping can be more meaningful

Dear Lord Bobo, what political ideology do you most identify with? @adriene, via Twitter

Free and fair elections?

Seriously, will we ever have a free and fair election focusing on bread and butter issues for once? @firdaus_h via Twitter.

Blacklisting gutter politics

What do you think about our country’s current situation, and where it is heading? @abbyshahrin, via Twitter

Casting votes for Lord Bobo to lead Malaysia?

Dear Supreme Being, when I vote in the next general election, do I vote based on person, party, or policy? How to decide? @izmil_amri, via Twitter

 

 

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